when you wish upon a star

So here I sit, 3:10am, with one day left of Spring Break.

I can't say anything notable happened this break. I got some internship apps done. Caught up on reading, sort of. I have shittons of work left I didn't do. Internships I didn't apply to yet.

Okay, I lied. I did do something notable. Gin and tonics. Ahh.
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Cornell. In 26 hours, I will be back on a bus to Cornell.

Sometimes (as I told my sister today), I wonder if I made the right decision going to Cornell. I didn't want to go to Rutgers, but..was choosing the only other feasible alternative the right decision?

One thing that still bothers me is that...it's in the middle of fucking nowhere. Sure the scenery is nice, but c'mon. Trees are trees. After a while, you get bored of fucking trees. Okay, that sounded weird.

Sometimes, I wish that I had gone to school in a city. Chicago. NYC. LA. I don't care which one..just one where there's more LIFE and commotion and people in a rush. A place where life isn't slow and doesn't feel like a drawn out death of academia and courses you dislike.

But there's good things too...there's the quiet happiness I've found of being with a special someone, the exquisite flavor of a good froyo with mochi toppings, the camaraderie of my BJJ club.

I guess it reminds me of the yin-yang. Even in the black area, there's that small circle of white, and vice versa. Even when it seems that everything is absolute and utter shit, there's still that small (sometimes seemingly insignificant) hint of light and..not shit.

I'm not arguing for believing in hope. I just don't know if I am (or if it is even possible) to be 100% happy with where I am in life, what I'm doing, and where I am headed.